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Courtesy of 12 year old “Mag”

A fantastic thunder storm has rolled into our little part of Tennessee and the heavy rain has made the mountains disappear in a hazy fog of grey-green.  Our lights keep flickering and I’m hoping against hope that we don’t loose power because tonight is Caleb’s choir practice.  I love our house but do not want to be stuck here in the dark alone.  The stormy weather reminds me of a passage I wrote in my diary when I was 12 that I ran across yesterday when I was going through some boxes.  Pardon the misspellings and the improper use of punctuation I was only 12 after all.  [smile]

Diary, I need to write some descriptions in you. So that I might learn to write well.
The day was as drery [dreary] as a young boy who has just lost his true love.
-Mag

I have a sneaking suspicion that 12 year old “Mag” might have been just a bit pretentious and definitely a completely hopeless romantic.  [smile]   In the entries that follow I gush about my crush on a boy named Alexander, going to shop for school supplies, attending the funeral of someone in my dad’s church, and my first observations of middle school!

August 22
1st day was OK. I think my teachers will be pretty good… Things that have changed:  No more holding hands or smucking [I have no idea what term “Mag” is trying to spell here!] at school, and All the boys talk “Deeper“.  It is so wierd [weird]!  I think it will be a good year, Mag
P.S. I think Alexander likes me.

The post script is written with a heart drawn around it and hearts before and after Alexander’s name.  I must have been really into this guy.  Actually I think it’s indicative of an interest in boys in general because before he diary peters out less than a month later I mention at least 4 other boys who I like!  [smile]

I remember wanting to be in love for such a long time and becoming frustrated with ups and downs of waiting for “love” to happen.  While I waited, I read about love in the pages of Anne of Green Gables and Pride and Prejudice and The Rosary and thought I was becoming an expert on the subject.  [smile]  In the process of reading about such independent heroines, I found the courage to not just wait for love to come along, but also to live life and have my own adventures in the meantime.  When I look back on my almost 30 years of life, I am so grateful for the whole of it.  I am grateful for my wonderful childhood with loving parents and perfectly annoying younger siblings.  I am grateful for the boy-crazy middle school, high school, and yes even college years.  I am grateful for my years of adventuring in far off lands.  I am grateful for the amazing man who surprised me the forever searching romantic and swept me off my feet.  I am grateful for our current adventure and so grateful for the opportunity to take a moment to reflect.

The storm is passing and I think –fingers crossed– that I am out of danger of losing power.  Best of all I can see my mountains again.

-Margaret

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